}); 10 Terrific Alternatives To Watching The Super Bowl – Blinds-Eye View

10 Terrific Alternatives To Watching The Super Bowl

Yes, I realize that this is a day late, but I just came up with the idea.  Those who know me well are well aware of my dislike for sports.  I don’t enjoy playing them, I don’t enjoy watching them, I don’t enjoy hearing about them.  I know, that makes me totally “un-merican,” a communist, a devil worshiper, and probably a seal clubber to boot.  That being said, here are 10 things I’d rather do than deal with all the Super Bowl hype.

#10  Frontal Lobotomy

Maybe with a chunk of my brain gone, I’d be able to enjoy the game more?

#9    Getting an STD

Itching, scratching, blisters, open sores, my junk falling off.  All of these would be more preferable than watching the Super Bowl.  And on the upside, I’d at least enjoy the process of getting the STD…lol.

#8    Doing your homework or housework

At least you get something out of these two annoyances

#7    Shaving Off All My Body Hair

Not nearly as big of a pain in the ass (pun intended) than listening to those stupid announcers and their opinions of the game.

#6    Marty Time

This is a no-brainer.  Playing with yourself pretty much trumps everything, except having somebody else do it for ya…LMAO.

#5    Watching Jeopardy

It may be pompous, over intelligent, and impossible to answer ANY of the questions.  It still makes more sense than a bunch of guys running around tacking each other though.

#4    Self-Mutilation

The pain of torturing myself is nowhere near the level of pain I feel watching the game.

#3    Talking To People About Their Wonderful Love Lives

This is extremely painful for those of us who have led a life of solitude and loneliness.  Like salt on an open wound.  Still better than hearing about how good your team is, or how much the other team sucks.

#2    Hugging A Cactus

I’d rather deal with a bunch of painful pricks than have to watch or listen to a bunch of them.

#1    Do My Taxes

My numbers may not make me as much money as their jersey numbers, but at least I know that I earned what I make.

So, what would you enjoy doing more than watching the Super Bowl?  Leave your responses in the comments section below.  Oh, in all fairness, there is ONE good thing about the Super Bowl; The commercials, of course.