Here’s one to make your day a little brighter. No matter how much you may hate your current job, there’s always a “worse” one out there. I emphasize “worse,” because that’s not to say your job is any better than theirs. Any job where you’re working to support yourself and not mooch off other taxpayers is valid and holds pride. Nobody is better than anyone else because of their career path.
In this instance, the word “worse” just signifies a job that is most likely harder or less desirable than your own. The people working these jobs deserve just as much respect as anyone else, perhaps more. With that cleared up, on to my top 10 personal choices for the worst job.
#10 Slaughter House Worker
I enjoy a good steak as much as the next guy, so I have a lot of respect for the men and women who see that meat from the cow to my plate. I don’t consider myself squeamish, but I don’t think I could enjoy and meat as much if I had to do what these workers have to do, in such conditions. No offense, but BLECK!
While we’re on the subject of dead meat, being a fluffer would definitely be no picnic either. If you don’t know what one is, you probably just missed both bad jokes in that first sentence. Go back and reread it after I explain. A fluffer is a very important position on a pornographic movie set. They are the people that keep the male actors “hard” in between clip takes. Don’t think of me as being anti-gay here. Though I am strictly a boob lover myself, I believe in equality of all sexual preferences. I just can’t see myself handling men’s penises all day, keeping them hard for a living.
I’m sure a lot of people who are straight, gay, male, and female would agree. Handling that amount of wood during an 8-hour work day would have to end up giving you splinters. Or, at the least, the most buff wrist and jaw muscles you ever saw….lol.
You have to admit, out of all the professions here, there is probably no other loathed so much as the telemarketer. We all hate to be called and bothered by them. Hell, in this day and age we don’t like to be called by ANYONE anymore, let alone an unsolicited call from a stranger trying to sell us something we don’t want. Again, I respect these people for being out there supporting themselves, but it is far from what I would describe as a favorable job. Especially considering the irate people they have to deal with on a daily business, and at least a portion of their income is based on commissions. Not a good combination.
#7 Sewer Worker
Talk about a shitty job. I don’t think I really need to qualify this one for the list. Though it’s a necessary position to fill, I can’t imagine this being anybody’s first choice for employment. I’d love to be proven wrong though by someone who has done this and found a reason to enjoy the work. It would make an awesome rebuttal. Bad pun noted.
#6 Animal Masturbator/Enseminator
And you thought being a fluffer was bad. Again, a necessary job, but one I’ll pass on. I enjoy happy animals, but I don’t think I’d enjoy making them happy like this…lol.
#5 Door-to-Door Salesman
I put this one in the same category as the telemarketer. Nobody wants to deal with this guy, nobody wants to be this guy. The only upside of this type of job is getting to know and talk to people. At least those of them that will let you past the threshold.
Yet another position nobody seeks after; Cleaning up after other people. We’re disgusting.
#3 Crime Scene Cleaner
Oh sure, it would be cool to be one of those sexy CSI officers who figure out who done it, how they have done it, and if it really was with a candlestick in the library. Not so cool and sexy is the poor slob that has to clean up the multiple murder crime scene. But that’s pretty much a no-brainer. (Bad pun acknowledged.)
Though these people make a real killing with their business (Bad pun noted) in the regards to money as well. It can’t be the most glamorous job. Embalming and preparing dead bodies for both display and burial, dealing with all the crying, mourning people day after day. Not a job that I could do. And on the other side, the gouging prices of it all, and the tactics they use to make you feel guilty if you’re not giving the dearly departed the most expensive casket, flowers, and arrangements? I couldn’t be that low, especially to hurting people.
#1 Garbage Man
Just like the janitor who has to clean up the horror left behind by the general public, I wouldn’t want to be the person who had to deal with everything society throws out. Garbage is a fact of life, but it’s a disgusting part of it. I’m quite happy only having to deal with me and my family’s alone. Spending hours dealing with other people’s? No thanks!
So, do you agree with my choices? Is there a position you think is more deserving to be on the list? Let me know in the comments section below.